MHProNews notes the following installment of “Words of Wisdom Through the Ages” by Tim Connors was provided to MHProNews under the title, “Happy 250th Birthday America.”
“Better to die fighting for freedom then be a prisoner all the days of your life.” B. Marley.
Freedom is not just about being a free citizen in my opinion. It’s also about a variety of other freedoms such as – social freedom, freedom to be, freedom to think, freedom to believe and so many more. Bob Marley has been one of my heroes for many years, it’s sad that he died so young but what a great singer and also in my view a great thinker. My question for you this month is, are you free on the inside and not just the outside? Are you in control of your thinking, emotions, feelings and attitudes etc. or are any of them a slave to something or someone on the outside? Can you be you at work, in a relationship or in a social activity? Over the years I have observed a great many people who had to edit their feelings in some relationship for fear of rejection, reprisal or negative consequences. Just one quick example. Years ago, in one of my first jobs as a VP of sales and marketing, the boss (president) called me into his office to tell me that he didn’t like some of my behaviors. So, I asked him, what were the consequences if I didn’t change them? He just said, You are outa here. So, I said to him, I’ll save you the trouble, it’s been fun, but I’m out here. You will have my resignation on your desk in an hour. Was that easy? No. Negative consequences – yes. Would I do it again knowing what I know now – yes. So, are you not free in some area of your life for fear of the negative consequences?
“In the midst of our daily struggles, we should always find reasons to celebrate.” M. Jordan.
What or when do you celebrate in life? Special events? Special people? Special achievements? Or anything else? For me celebration can have many forms. When I return from a speaking engagement I celebrate safe travels. When I wake in the morning I celebrate another day. And when I find my keys that I thought were lost I celebrate. My point – why not celebrate the little things in life just as you do some of the bigger items. Why not live daily with an attitude of celebration? One of my favorite celebrations is when I have failed at something and I emerge with learning, new approaches, lessons learned, new ideas and new anything. One of my Mantras is “If it happens, I will get exited and if it doesn’t, I won’t be disappointed.” Got something you should celebrate today, this week or every day? Do you have a list of things you want to be sure of and never forget to celebrate? Do you share your celebrations with others or alone? Or are you just suck in – same stuff different day?
“Everyday, think as you wake up, today I am fortunate to be alive, I have a precious human life, I am not going to waste it.” Dalai Lama.
Born (Date) – Died (Date) And between these you ______?
The only thing that is certain in life is that we are all going to die – we don’t know when, where or how but some day we will experience our last day on earth. So the question is – how are you living each day or how will you live the time you have left? Strange questions? I don’t think so.
People who accomplish the most in life regardless of its value to themselves or humanity spend their days in pursuit of more or better and I’m not talking about more or better stuff or wealth but more or better experiences that add value to their time here.
It doesn’t matter if you are a teacher, laborer, physician, CEO, parent or any and every other life role – in the end your legacy that you leave behind will not be because of what you owned, how smart or famous you were or how long you lived but simply what or how you contributed to life and or others whether friends, relatives or total strangers.
Life – such a fragile concept and oh so short when you really think about it. The earth has been here for billions of years. Life has been here for millions of years, and we have seventy or eighty years to live. Scary huh? It isn’t my intent to give you a lesson on death and how you should prepare for it or handle it but how you can live while you are still here.
Over the years I have observed many people who just existed waiting to die and I have known many people who squeeze every ounce of life out of every minute. How about you – which category are you in?
I have watched people chase fame and wealth who in the end leave here with many regrets. I have known people who measured their value by their bank balance, latest vacation or shopping spree. And I have witnessed many who believed that life was about them and only them. Very sad when you think about it.
What do you want your legacy to be? How do you want to be remembered – for what you had or earned, what you accomplished, what you learned or knew or some other factor?
Or do you want to be remembered for how you helped others, loved, shared, sacrificed and encouraged those who crossed your path or you shared life with?
“Anger, pain, resentment, and even hate are best healed through compassionate conversation, not through censorship and derision.” Lex Fridman
Avoiding tough conversations is never easy. Telling someone you have changed your mind about something. Ending a relationship. Forgiving someone. Letting go of hurtful feelings or regrets about what was said or not said. Disagreeing when you know it will create conflict. Sharing intimate secrets that you have avoided. Out and out lying about anything for any reason. I could go on as I’m sure you have been on both the receiving end and the one sending the message. Why do we avoid these difficult conversations?
Are we so insecure or in need of other people’s approval or acceptance or is it because we don’t want to hurt people’s feelings? Is it because we can’t handle conflict or is our self-esteem so low that we have to hide the difficult stuff?
Integrity based communication today is getting extremely difficult because it’s getting to the point that we can’t say anything to anyone without the fear of hurting their feelings, offending them or just giving them an excuse to reply with verbal anger, vengeance or revenge.
If you were born and raised in the north, I’ll bet that sooner or later you have said something that irked a southerner. I know I have.
If you are a boomer, I’m sure you have said something that annoyed a 20-year-old. And I’m sure if you are a teen, you have upset an old codger.
It’s never easy to share feelings or even truth from our perspective when we are not sure how others will react to us and what we share and how. Everyone has unique perspectives, expectations and how much truth or reality they can handle but in the end when we avoid sharing what we believe, how we feel or what we want or need to share we set up relationships for greater confusion, disappointment, anxiety or continued and even increased pain and uncertainty.
In the end the best solution to all conflict, disagreements, uncertainty or unknown potential reactions is to open up, converse, share and just talk about what you are feeling, experiencing or desiring. Unfortunately, far too often most people hold back, keep quiet or just hope things will improve without positive action on their part. Yes, sometimes time can heal but more often than not it takes initiative on the part of someone to open the door to addressing issues that can if avoided only worsen a relationship over time. Avoiding a discussion or conversation with someone? Why?
“In business ‘professionalism’ is not a tactic but a moral value.” A. Kalantri
What is professionalism? Is it different for business stuff vs. personal circumstances? Is it different because of position or responsibilities? Is it only about work or career? Trust me, I spent a couple of hours trying to get some relatable facts on this topic, but all I could find was general traits, tactics, or behaviors. So here is what I found and then I will give you a very brief overview of my take.
Professionalism is the conduct, qualities, and standards expected of a person in a professional role. It involves consistently behaving in a competent, ethical, responsible, and respectful manner. Key characteristics of professionalism include:
Competence, Integrity, Responsibility, Respect, Reliability, Accountability, Professional appearance, Communication, Consistency, Discipline, Excellence, Personal growth, Resilience, and Perseverance.
Really, does anyone have all these traits consistently regardless of circumstances? I doubt it.
My take is that Professionalism relates more to the quote than all the above and why? Well, if the right moral values are present in someone’s personality, it won’t make a difference how few of the required traits (above) a person has, but if a person has all of the specific qualities, but lacks the right moral values . . . Your thoughts . . .
Are we currently heading in the right direction when it comes to professionalism in life? Is AI going to have negative or positive impact on professionalism? Are the younger generations including or eliminating professionalism from their lives, careers and relationships?
Is Spirituality becoming a lesser or greater partner when it comes to professionalism?
Why not give it some thoughts on your take on where we are heading when it comes to professionalism and life . . .
– Since summer is when a lot of folks read more thought I would share 8 of my favorite books that I am sure you would enjoy.
Nasty People – Carter The Voice of Knowledge – Ruiz
Power of Patience – Ryan It’s all Going Back in The Box – Ortberg
Brain Rules – Medina Wakeup Calls – Allenbaugh
Messy Spirituality – Yaconelli Ask it – Stanley
Celebrate your FREEDOMS
“Every Day”
— MHProNews notes that the thoughts above are those of the author, Tim Connor, CSP. Connor has been periodically contributing to MHProNews for about 16 years. According to Penguin-Random House Books: Tim Connor, CSP, is a full-time speaker and trainer as well as the author of numerous books and several bestsellers, including Soft Sell. Since 1973, he has given over 5000 custom presentations in 18 countries on topics such as customer focused sales, peak performance management, and building positive business and personal relationships.” Connor has addressed numerous manufactured housing industry and other forms of construction conventions and meetings. Per Connor to MHProNews, he has now spoken in 29 countries and has published over 80 books. Tim Connor’s Words of Wisdom blog is linked here. For those who have not yet experienced Connor live and in person, he gets and keeps a professional audience engaged. Samples of other Connor articles follow. —
