Weekly Relationship Tips
Words of wisdom for this week.
“Act happy, feel happy, be happy, without a reason in the world. Then you can love, and do what you will.”
~ Dan Millman
Sooner or later each of us needs some private time away from the expectations, demands and even the support of our partner. I am not suggesting here what many people commonly refer to as “I need some space.” This is usually a way people who cannot communicate their feelings honestly say to their partner, “I want to end this relationship.” Not always, mind you, but more often than not.
The private time I am referring to here is quite different. It is not designed to be an escape, but a period of introspection, contemplation or just looking at some aspect of your life or relationship where positive changes might be in order.
People who are in relationships where one or both of the partners travel a lot, have time apart, but they don’t necessarily use it for the above listed reasons. There are meetings, travel issues, career responsibilities, errands, children etc. that prevent the quiet private time that each of us craves and needs for inner peace, physical and emotional health as well as an opportunity to reduce our stress.
There are many ways to find this quiet time. You can meditate, take walks in the park or woods, you can take a drive along a scenic highway or you can just walk your dog. You can attend a retreat, vision quest or any number of spiritual events that last from an hour to several days.
Or, as an alternative when life seems to be overwhelming, you can just drop out and walk away from the pressure, stress, responsibilities of life, your career and/or your relationship for a few hours or days.
Over the years I have discovered that people who find outlets for the stressors in their life and take the time to have ‘private’ time, tend to have better and more positive and nurturing relationships than those who don’t. Why is this? One reason is that there is no need to ‘take out’ their frustrations, anxieties or issues on their partner or even bring them into the relationship at all. Relationships are hard enough as it is with their own unique challenges – why make them even more difficult by bringing all of your pent-up career or life issues to your partner for them to solve. There is nothing wrong with discussing career or life issues, problems, challenges etc. with your partner, that is not what I am saying – so don’t work yourself into a twit here and email me that I have gone over the edge.
We all have the answers to life we need inside us that we need to; survive, prosper and experience a joyous life that was meant to be, but we need to quiet our outer world from time to time so that we can hear this inner guidance. It would be like trying to write a serious letter with any number of external distractions going on at the same time. Yes, the letter might get written, but how good would it be? Why not take some time this week for yourself to listen to your hearts inner urgings, dreams, desires or even fears. They might just surprise you!